Trepidations on moving forward and advancing for life right now. I have a lot of hope on the future and somehow the enablers of the world have me feeling good about believing in myself and thing I can make this art thing work. I really believe in this project and am tweaking it a lot in my head.
Even as I sit here I am looking at how to make this but it’s evolving beyond the original concept. OMG, I just JUST had an epiphany.
Okay, too much to explain right now… got to go.

STOP SCREAMING AT ME!!!!!!!!
Okay, now to something a little less schizophrenic. To start off with, a little background, I am a believer in Augurism (spell check tells me this is not a word). It is something they last used (to my knowledge with the exception of current Wicca) in ancient Rome to tell the future, present past blah blah blah. Like if an eagle appeared in the sky the battle would be victorious; end of long explanation.
Been seeing a lot of signs, but because of the DISASTER that was my move to Portland, I have been ignoring things and letting other things stand in my way. Today, no less than half a dozen sign and one actually spoken to my FACE by someone completely out of character like she was possessed…. yeh.
I think God or the Universe or whatever… has been kicking me in the balls over and over and over and I am too engrossed in NOTHING to listen.
Hm… when I am sober tomorrow I’ll revisit these thoughts.

Since coming home from Burning Man this year I have made some promises to myself as previously noted. Chiefly, in my diet and my activity. I have been carrying about 50 pounds I want to get rid off.
Yesterday my friend Deb told me she lost 50 pounds herself and I was so impressed.
Mornings:
Get up eat something lite like a yogurt, fruit or whatever is light and metabolic.
Then take Tom for a long walk (high paced) going more than 30 minutes
Eat something for breakfast later, small and balanced with some coffee
Middle Day:
Small lunch usually a salad or wrap with healthy ingredients, non-fat bits for flavor like fat-free cheese or dressing
Gym time: Yoga or Cardio
Late Day:
Dinner around six and much like Lunch. Turkey patty or veggie patty
Often end up snacking on a little something in the evening… probably the worst part regards to my diet
Basically I removed milk and bread from my diet right now, not eating mets with a high fat content. I made beans, chick peas, and have these elements incorporated in my diet. I tried making a little hummus and there was so much fat incorporated into it it turned me off a little.
Funny, when you make the food and know exactly what is in it .. you might think differently how and when to eat it.
Still marching forward… good eats!

The trip to Burning Man is already detailed in the Burning Man section of my personal site.
In the final days of the trip I had time to do a lot of contemplating and deciding where to start moving in my life. I have been in a place of fantasy and delusion for a while and I am finding it is really time for action.
Sunday, I could not stop crying. I was a little sad bitch that got chocked up over the finality of it all … so I went away from camp to be on my own for a couple hours.
I can recommend to anyone that being completely broken away from society/comforts for a while is a good way to push that reset button.
There are some things I already decided on before going to BM that would be in place when I left; those are still active goals.
I was looking for some artistic inspiration that was missing and I found it.
A reaction to the situation previous was to move away from Vegas before October, but running away is not so prudent.
These are the different things I was thinking about while off planet.

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