Author Archive: scott.kay

Ouija Board use

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Been curious about this for a while. I know when people misuse these things they end up with some stupid reactions from the spirit world. Don’t believe me? Just misuse one of these things.

  1. Be prepared to use the board. Do not use the board alone. Get some friends to use the board with you. to protect yourself, Get sage, sage incense with an earthly smell to it. Light the incense,
  2. Spread the incense smoke around the board. this should make you be prepared for your session
  3. Say an Affirmation. Ones you are ready to start a session, say a prayer so that you can communicate with a good spirit. Here is the prayer for you:
    • “I CALL UPON THE ANGELS FROM THE LIGHT, CALL UPON MY SPIRIT GUIDES, GUARDIAN ANGELS FROM THE LIGHT TO COME HELP ME CLEANS THE BOARD. PLEASE REMOVE NEGATIVITY FROM THIS BOARD AND SURROUND IT WITH HEAVENLY LIGHT!” Keep repeating it until you feel a light, and positive energy from the board. Then when you hear a spirit say hello, say a prayer so you can have a good spirit to talk to you.
  4. 251px-Ouija-BoardBegin your session When you begin your session, no laughing or talking. Be quiet and ask positive questions, Do not ask questions that makes the spirits angry such as, “are you sexy?” Ask the spirits a positive question. some times the planchatte moves slowly. If the planchatte moves slowly, Be patient! REMEMBER, This is a spirit you are talking to! Not a person. You may be impatient with a person but you must be patient with a spirit.
  5. End your session properly. When you are done talking to a spirit, say goodbye to it. After you say goodbye, say, “WE ARE SENDING THE SPIRITS BACK TO WHERE THEY CAME FROM AND WE ARE CLOSING THE DOOR.” This shows that you are closing the doorway for the spirits. When you end your session, wrap the board with white cloth and put it somewhere such as your drawer.

– Source
So, yes I am thinking about getting one of these. I want what I consider a real channel into the spirit world a leap ahead of what I can do on my own. Just saying.

my mind

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I don’t talk about certain things very often. Seems when I do it goes against the grain of the flow of the universe. Count this one up as one of my stranger entries.
1001711_217409428414080_1896676735_nEven my witchy friends don’t quite know how to wrap their heads around some if my shit. I swear nature tells me they should be the first ones on board my occasional crazy train but they’re not.
I am being vague on purpose. The purpose was mentioned in the first paragraph.
The world I live in is very different than yours. The solidness of air, the tingle of ambient energy, the radiance of a life force. I see into the souls of those who cannot see themselves.
Keep in mind my thoughts work in metaphors and pictures. I accept the world around me on the same premise.
It frees me to see it differently. I feel intense joy and in the secular world intense anger and resentment. Peace is hardly an option except when far removed from it all.
brainGood examples of this are several; Burning Man, Faery land (Radical Faery not mythical; though given the time of this entry I am sure it needed to be clarified), and just about anytime I can completely escape the digital leash.
There is a powerful vein of metaphysical energy in the world humans do not respect or honor. It can be a magical thing.
A radical faery I know once said that all humans have magic on them. I told him that simply was not true. Can’t say I know that for certain. But what I do know is seriously fucked up.
Now who sounds crazy now; yep, still me. Not sure why I needed to spill this now. Vague vernal vomit.
Wish I could just say it. But… Just flushing it out.

Updates and Stats

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Me @ Burning Man 2013

Taken by Justin of Justin & Nathan www.sunguardians.net my camp mates!


Funny about keeping a personal blog updated… sometimes this damn things reallllllly get’s neglected. I let it go more than a year on design and software. After all the updates, all my configurations were erased (thanks WordPress).
Now the bloody thing is updated again and I am not sure how to use it. I will keep letting things flow out of my head on this but will try and do in the good times more, less in the harder times, though it helps to get things out.
Once upon a time I had a lot of followers on this thing. I think about a year ago someone creeped me out so I backed off on the postings. Since coming to San Francisco I have had far more than my share of creeps.
Is anyone out there reading this stuff? Please add comments below. I am curious.

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Goals and plans 2013 to 2014

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Having trouble focusing on what I need for me. I came back from Burning Man with some new goals and have not written any of them down. Everything is a distraction and little allows for focus except for C Monster… well, I have to focus on him when he is around because our time together is becoming more precious.
a3My work schedule is opposite his and we have to see each other less. I cannot cook for him like I would like and that is a solid bummer. I love making us dinner at home.
Anyway, goals for the year are important and making them happen is also vital. I have not always been successful.  Understand that over the many years I have figured out that September is a new beginning; it just always seems to work out that way. The rest of the year just seems to get harder and harder, but with a new outlook hopefully that will change:
Immediate Needs:

  • start paying people back I owe money to; bills and rent and more… people who helped finance my Burn this year and my parents who have been taking care of my dog who has been really ill
  • clean out my clutter and create more order

Oh I hate chaos and though it has it’s uses this time in my life is not it. My bills are horribly out of control and I need to regain some balance and I am really at the stage where I almost have no where to turn but bankruptcy. My student loans and some small tax issues are my biggest demons right now.
Short Term Goals include:

  • September – December: Caught up on Bills /  Debts
    –  I want to get some welding classes started
    – I need a routine that includes health and fitness
  • December – January: Prep for 2014 which includes a new living situation, moving in with C Monster, preparing for Burning Man
    – Burning Man tickets go on sale January but we are applying for low income
    – Start planning for a future with C Monster
  • February – May: Stabilize life
    – this is where life will throw me a curve ball and I will have to learn to roll with it as usual.
  • June – August: Prep for Burning Man
    – I have decided I want to live in a more affordable place and
    – Buy a car
  • August: Burning Man
  • September – a new year begins

Longer Term Goals

  • 1 year: figure out if C Monster and I are ready for the big leap:
    – after financial rebuilding: move in and / possibly get married
    – buy a car
    – C Monster should be in school starting this year
  • 2 year: open my own restaurant (see below*)

Career is a big goal for me right now and despite me abandoning Dixie SF in June; I am working on a calculated plan to move ahead in my career. I am watching the ladder very carefully and trying to figure out what life is stirring me toward.
The message of the universe is not always clear, but I will tell you it was screaming at me to leave Dixie. I felt rewarded that I got a job right before Burning Man which I started right after; coincidence? I do not think so. The universe has a plan for me and I am trying like hell to make it work in a positive light for me. *I have a project I started in 2013 by registering a corporation called “Amazing Toaster, LLC” that has gone no where. But that is for another day.

2013 Cargo Cult Trip Report

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Another year passed and I would have to say this was my finest; with the exception of my first year. One could point out my last two years were so awful, but for that I only have myself to blame.

I did threaten fate, as it were, by swearing I would have a drama free burn. I brought my own theme camp. It was SunGuardians positioned at 7:45 & I with a 60′ x 60′ span of land that resulted in pure heaven.

I developed this project almost 3 years ago and finally found the right opportunity to see it to life. 3 other people saw my vision and jumped in and together we made it happen. It was a real group effort and I could not have expected that a first year theme camp could have gone more right.

My burn was fantastic because of the people I was surrounded by. It was the people I got to know better and the new people that crossed into my life.

Las Vegas in da House

Seeing my old roomie, Gemini, was sublime. I spent a lot of time with her in her camp called Whofarted? Camp.

I got to spend some time with others including Dirk and Holly at Kosmic Dust and Gary and Damien at FUCK Camp. Yes, that was the name.

I also met Barb and Tom who happen to camp right next door from us at Sun Guardians and I kept thinking of all the people they needed to meet in Vegas. Their initial encounter with certain Vegas leadership left them cold. But! I assured them that city is packed with amazing burners!

One night on the Crisco Disco art car my camp-mates from

Post Burning Man thoughts

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It’s been a week since coming back from Burning Man and the head trip continues. All the baggage I started off with has shifted on meaning.
1011623_10151877957531197_734630056_nI stayed sober, relatively speaking, most of the week. Booze and other things were not a priority. I also went to the burn on a shoestring budget and mostly on the wings of others so that helped. Turned out to be a blessing to be too broke and so busy that my energies were better focused.
Gave me a lot more time to think about priorities and my life scenario. I did a lot of reflection while celebrating a lot of friends I have not seen in a while.
For C Monster and I there is a closeness that came from it. Our relationship feels stronger.
For everything else I heard a message that resonated: “Put out to the universe what you want back.” To me that means I have to find something inside myself that allows me to be more positive.
Although I am a diehard optimist, I can be surprisingly negative and mean. I have been judgy and disgusted by people. Omg people make me angry!
At Burning Man this year I buried all my reactions and did all I could to let stuff flow tight off my back and I seem to have been better for it.
After coming back I started the new job and boy has it been tough. Feels like a younger man’s game.
Time will tell. But if I can be a better me I will embrace that.

Against the wall again

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One of the older faeries here in the city sent me a text message asking I we could meet and talk. He mentioned my current hard times and was offering to be a sounding board on some levels. So I am waiting outside Cafe Flore for him. He text me saying he would be a little late.
I spend a lot of time analyzing. I spent a lot of time trying to find reason. Some times I make conclusions and then discover how far far far I am from reality.
I am a misfit. I’ve become some desperate wreck trying to balance between what is right….what I should do versus what my gut says…versus Common sense’.
People are great with advice and what they insist is right but are not around to see the impact of the crash.
I have aligned myself with two cultures or ideals that proselytizes radical self expression and radical self reliance and the two seem to hardly fit together unless there is a trust fund in the back pocket.
It’s nice how my boyfriend is working hard on being supportive even as he goes through his own stuff right now.
My mom and step dad are struggling so much too. I imagine going to my ex, Adolfo, asking for help but that is just one more potential disaster.
Its hard to breathe. Anger rules me inside. Fear. Anxiety. How does one stay open in all of that?
Ordering one well overdue miracle please.

Someone save me some space by that dumpster…

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Seem unimaginable that I have been out of work almost a whole month now and have no prospects. Although I have had amazing interviews it has amounted to nothing. I am horrible at this stuff.
No rent money, no bill money, no money – period. I need to get something going and quickly because the money monster is chomping on my ass.
I need to get $3K into my + column and quickly which will get me into September. because no matter what I do unless I come up with a way to get some quick cash it will take a while for a paycheck to roll in.

  • 800.00 rent
  • 1oo.00 phone
  • 150.00 odd bills

and that is just for immediate needs…





Well well well…

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It’s been a long ass time since I made an entry on this section of my site. I have been busy making plans if nothing else… getting things ready and so forth for Sun Guardians (Facebook / Web Site). Yes, I am bringing my own theme camp this year. This is the one I have been working on for about 3 years.

Most of the documentation is on the Facebook page, but yay for me… not I need to get a ticket and find out how I am getting there.

 

Amazing is what amazing does

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I saw this today in a stupid commercial… but it’s what is missing when a lot of people look at me and the things I do. “A lot of people” seem to exclude a lot of faeries and burners I know… but…
“Normal can never be AMAZING”
Burning Man 2012In spite of how much people have wanted me to I have always shed the normal path of life. Even with the good decisions and the bad ones I found myself staring fate right in the face.
I have lived my life dreaming. I also remember a childhood being told by a father how I would always be a failure. In the end, I traveled a big chunk of the world and I met movie stars, rock stars, know some of the finest DJ’s on the planet and have felt immense joy and immense anguish. Flown in jets, helicopters and felt such love. I fell down a lot. But I keep getting back up.
Tom the DogI can stand here facing an unknown future and still do a happy dance with amazing people. I worry about my mom and I feel like I failed her, my stepdad and my amazing Tom-Dog. I love them so much. My step dad has been more a dad than the biological one I once knew. I want to do more for her… I would do anything… but being average or normal was never my calling.
NOT A PITY PARTY… but I stand here shedding regrets while respecting the possibilities of the future. I have struggled to toss off the demons and while some are still clinging on hard and firm I have hope. I have this resilient and occasional fleeting sense of hope that keeps me alive.
Damn, too much time on ones hands is not good. I have a ton a ton of shit to do. As I told a friend last night… I got to clear out my negative baggage and move on.
I seek an amazing life. No time for the negative.Me in Bagkok