Just thought I would make a note. This year is passing slowly… yet one of my big milestones for the year is coming up… yes – Burning Man. I am looking ahead at the event coming in 41 days and wondering… what then?

But with all the stuff going on right now… a distinct lack of income, over committed social life, a dog that keeps getting hurt, and a sudden realization that I have too much shit in my apartment… ugh.

I have been examining my mortality again, too. I should be getting back my blood tests this week from my exam at the VA a week ago. I have to imagine that if there was anything important in the tests they would certainly have called me before today. I took these blood tests almost a month ago…? right?

So… life is decent. I am blessed – I know. I find myself worrying about my mom some times and thinking about my father (yes, I went on quite a rant about him a few times in the life of this diary). But – I miss the good side of him. My family ties are sometimes lost… but I found out 2 of my cousins are getting married within a couple weeks of each other… both are cool cousins.

All of my cousins are cool, ‘cept the one meth-head. My cousin Leah is such a cutie and she has such a beautiful kid. ALL my family has SUCH good looking kids. My biological sister has some beautiful kids! Same with cousin Raechel!

I am so jealous… guess that is part of my own mortality. I wanted kids so bad myself. One son. I would have been very happy with a kid. But I am so immature and so irresponsible to have a kid. I think I’d make a good dad. Right?


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